Rabbi’s Sermon 23rd November 2024/22nd Cheshvan 5785

When Abraham purchased that field 

"A woman is acquired through money". OMG, that's horrible; where did it come from?

That's from the Mishnah [Kiddushin 1:1]. Jewish Law. Written probably around 230 CE.

OMG, Rabbi, "A woman is acquired"? That is patriarchy at its worst. So ... what is currently taught in places like the Gender Studies University Departments and in other authoritative places, such as the orange-coloured pages of the Guardian... is it true? Are we Jews the quintessential patriarchal tribe? Is our religion and our law guilty of discriminating against women, of treating women like items that can be - as per the text - acquired through money? What are we, ISIS? 

Hold on. The language is harsh (and believe me, if you continue reading, it gets worse), but we should compare it with other existing systems of law. We should also take into consideration that this system of Jewish law was a way to set some order in a lawless world, the Land of Israel after the Roman conquest, where women were exposed to the constant danger of rape. It was an improvement, that a woman could find safety through what may seem like monetary transactions. A relative improvement, but an improvement still. 

Also, if we continue reading, down two or three lines, we encounter the following paragraph: "A woman acquires herself through the bill of divorce." This makes this legislation a little less troubling for us, because we see that divorce is admitted—which is not the case in many religions, and certainly it was not in Roman times. 

So yes, this passage from the Mishna, "A woman is acquired through money," comes from a patriarchal world, a time when the power of men over women was not questioned. 

Compared to other civilisations, the Jewish world was not so oppressive towards women at the time. Women had some agency. 

But there is something deeper and more interesting for us today. Let's dig further. Remember, whenever we consider a piece of Jewish Law (as in the Mishna or elsewhere), we must identify the references to the Biblical text to better understand the Rabbis' reasoning. And guess what? This piece of legislation is founded on the Biblical passage from this week's Torah portion. Genesis 23.

Abraham acquired a piece of land to bury his wife. He bought it from Ephron, a wealthy person of Hittite background, in Kiryat Arba, next to Hebron

Now, let us set aside the upsetting thought that this foundational event, the burial of Sara, the first Matriarch, took place in a city -Hebron- which "the international community" wants to forbid us Jews to live in. That's for another sermon. Today, I choose not to talk about "the international community". 

We are talking about Abraham and Sara, the first Jewish couple in human history. Why the language of "acquisition through money"? What does money have to do with love? Why do the Rabbis connect this passage—Abraham buying a plot of land to bury his wife—to the legislation about marriage? What's going on?

Let's unpack the verb "to acquire", לִקְנוֹת. 

There is a very famous passage in Pirkey Avot, which says   קְנֵה לְךָ חָבֵר, "acquire yourself a friend". But friendship cannot be bought. Friendship is not a commodity or an item. 

By using this language, the Torah is teaching something else: that friendship requires time, consideration, and building trust. Friendship is not a purchase; instead, it is an investment. Friendship involves an investment of time and emotions. 

The same goes for marriage. Marriage requires investment, investment of emotions, investment of time, investment of patience, and investment of trust. Marriage is an acquisition, not of a human beginning but of a shared future. 

The day of the wedding everything is beautiful: the chuppa, the ring, and the dancing. Still, if there is no trust or emotional investment in a shared future the union is built upon nothing and destined to fall. 

And what about growing old? The lowering of physical strength, the illnesses, the in and out of hospitals or nursing homes.... when support is needed. That is the moment when marriage requires an investment of time and energy. 

So, this is probably what the Torah wants to teach us, using the language of acquisition to tell the story of Abraham's purchase of the field for the tomb of Sara and using the same language to set the foundation of marriage legislation. By purchasing the field for her burial, Abraham shows that he cares not only for the needs of Sara's life but also for her needs beyond this life. He shows that he cared for her at the end of her journey as he had cared for her at the beginning of the trip when they were a young, loving couple.

At this point, let me share a reflection by Rav Soloveitchick, who points out that Abraham, even if he spent all his life wandering, was not correctly a nomad. He had a different relationship with the land. A relationship of investment. 

The relationship of shepherds and nomads with the land is similar to flirting: taking advantage of as much as you can from a place and then moving on in search of another place to feed your animals. It is not taking possession of land; it is more flirting with the land, and in the end, all the places look similar.

In our history, Abraham purchased a field (at a very high price) because he was not a shepherd who moved from place to place; his purchasing of the field was settling down in a place to invest in and grow. Again, this is a symbol of marital union. 

Finally, think about what happened after that negotiation. Ephron the Hittite was possibly boasting with his friends and family, like, "Ah ha, see what I have done; I managed to sell that old cave in Kiryat Arba to that old stranger who does not speak our language". 

But now, in 2024, tell me if there are any Hittites, the tribe to which Ephron belonged. The Hittites were a significant civilisation around the Bronze Age. They ruled over Turkey, Syria, and Lebanon for a couple of centuries. And then they assimilated with the Syrians, who were defeated by the Greeks who were conquered by the Romans, etc. So much for Ephron's big deal. 

On the other hand, Abraham, with the purchase of that field, established a family model based on love and emotional investment: one of the significant gifts of Jewish people to humanity. 

Today in Hebron, no one visits the tomb of any Hittite hero in search of inspiration, we Jews still visit the tomb of Sarah, which Abraham purchased that day; we do it along with the followers of other monotheistic faiths, like us, followers of Abraham, and with which we still hope to live in peace one day. 

Rabbi Dr Andrea Zanardo, PhD